This is my favourite episode of Dr Ettensohns podcast atm. I’ve listened to it several times & find it really helpful. I’m going to unabashedly promote his peerless work on the understanding & healing of NPD & for myself personally, the facets of BPD, the construction of it, that overlap with NPD are also being dealt with too.
I was discussing recently with my daughter who also has a range of nervous system damage with BPD traits from her traumatic childhood with me as her undx & unsupported profoundly mentally impaired mother - she mentioned her bodily self perception being that of a kind of amorphous blob & it reminded me of a description I made of myself, my own self perception of life in my body back on MySpace, back in 2006 when I first ventured to share something of my self publicly.
I felt very ‘thing’ like back then, very shapeless, amorphous & nonhuman on a self perception, interoception level. I said to her that I didn’t feel that way now after so much work, pre & post dxs. I feel like a human being now, with feelings that come & then actually go after, sometimes not even that long in time! Quel surprise! To not be permanently in a void, disassociated or otherwise in intense prolonged emotional pain of varying depth….. mostly too deep to be doing much else without finding something to block it out with. I’m very grateful as well as proud to have changed like this.
Anyway, there’s so many top quotes I could take from the video but I’ve got to go out now so I might add some later or tomorrow. Otherwise just watch it & share share share this Dr who is currently standing as a sole outpost of sanity in the pwNPD or BPD webosphere where damning & indeed stigmatising this population of the mentally & emotionally ill has been completely normalised.
No comments:
Post a Comment